I can promise you that the spirit
is a whole lot more anxious to help
you than you are to be helped.
from: Drawing on the Powers of Heaven
by: S. Dilworth Young
The unorthodox Mormon that I am...Im going to share with you something that I started...that most Mormons I know dont do.
I may have shared with you already...a part of my conversion story...the part about how incredibly difficult it was for me to pray, vocally or in private. Especially as a geeky, awkward teenager. The concept of prayer was foreign to me. Mormons start out EARLY teaching their kids to pray. They pray in Primary and at cub scout meetings and at family dinners. I never did that. And as a teenager...which was when I happened to discover that the Gospel had been restored to the earth by a prophet...one of the things that was expected, was to pray in meetings, to bless the food at meals; to pray, pray, pray!!
Prayer is a great thing. I pray all the time in my heart. I can now pray in planning meetings and over the food and in sacrament meeting and at family functions...though I still wish I didnt have to. I dont and never will enjoy getting up in front of people and being the center of attention. I alway get tongue tied and flustered...but I try to remember that all Im doing is asking for the Spirit of our Savior to be with us in whatever we are doing. I dont have to be flowery or too eloquent...I just need to be sincere.
We are also taught to be careful of vain repetitions when we pray. Sometimes thats tough to pull off as well. I truly do want the same things for my family and myself...not much changes around here. But I do try to not sound redundant.
I confess that Im a miserable failure at consistent, knee worn, prayer. I want to be better. And how do I propose to get better at this commandment you ask? Weeelllllll.... I have started a prayer book. Yep...thats right, a tiny winy prayer book. I have begun to fill its pages with prayers. I have pulled them from the pages of scripture. I have googled for prayers for patience. I have discovered eloquent prayers for hiking and for the love and gratitude of nature. (there are prayers for ANYTHING on line!!!) With some I have taken the liberty of rewriting them to fit my condition and attitudes and desires. Others stand alone in their beauty and simplicity and are right on the money for me. I have not written any down that have not moved me and uplifted me as I read them and ponder their words. I am grateful for these prayers and the spirit they bring me when I read them. I know am better off after having sent them heaven ward.
I may get some raised eye-brows with this post...
but I am confident that my motives are pure..for they are not for public ears...
I like this new tradition. After all, thats why Im here..to learn and grow and better my condition and the condition of those around me.
adieu and amen!!!
“Generations Apart.. United in Prayer.” by Nima Baharlooie