Its Not Always About Me

People know many things, and half of them

are wrong. If only we knew which half,

we'd have reason to be proud of our intelligence.

From: Hidden Empire

by: Orson Scott Card

Im haunted by a dear friend and loved ones' plight.

And a whole collection of family and friends are disturbed as well.

And though I may sound like this is all about me...it certainly is not!!

But...on the other hand, it is quickly becoming apparent that what rocks one persons world also rocks many!! And now I am having to deal with what am I going to do about the blow.

It is a trial of my faith.

My outlook on life is effected.

Will I become more afraid of the sun?

Will I become afraid for my life?

Will I be afraid to be too happy...for who knows what tomorrow will bring...

Will I be afraid that it might be me next or someone else that I love..statics prove that this WILL happen.

Whats going on!!!?

Lisa's reality is her own...of course...

yet it effects my sleep

it effects ALL my family that I love so dear, and that love her..

Our lives are so much richer as our family unit expands....there is no better evolution that this!

Our joys are greater, yet so do the opportunities for sorrows increase as well.

We are taught to pray for miracles...knowing that miracles dont often materialize... Or ...the miracles that come are not the ones we ask for.

I know that miracles are possible...but not probable. ( ouch...this hurts to admit) What am I to do with this knowledge..this lack of faith on my part. This reality that bites.

I believe that most of the pain and suffering in this world is due to greed, pride and selfishness.

What about the pain and heartache of cancer?

If all of society had a change of heart - hunger and war and homelessness could vanish from among us!

Not so with cancer.

Cancer seems to be “in our face” present everywhere! Seemingly out of control. People who live healthy, mindful lives are not exempt. People who live the antithesis of a pure and healthy life DONT get cancer. Go figure. What are we lowly humans to make of this?

We Mormons are fond of saying, when things go bad, that there must be opposition in all things.

Isnt there enough opposition elsewhere to then be attacked from within!?

Im just saying!!

As I vent here, I fully realize that there are no answers to this great dilemma. At least not yet. Not where my eyes can see anyway.

So here we all are...on another journey together. Who knows where it'll end up. Who knows what we'll learn along the way. But I can see now that we have advanced another step into the real school of hard knocks!!

and it aint no fun!!

We LOVE you dear Lisa. And our prayers in your behalf will never stop! And they will help!! No doubt of that! We will happily send you suggestions or keep our mouths shut. This is your journey and we are here to help and shout encouragement!! Know that that is what I do best. Lots of shouting and encouragement! And I pray as I learn and grow and vent along with you, that it is only in the best interest of you and your wonderful family. (and only a little bit about me and what I learn along the way.)

go here to read Lisa's own words on this development.